My vote is for #16 or maybe #35. Can't decide. I can relate to #16 though. I, too, have a PE degree. Decided to go for a Masters of science after that. Would have done the PhD, but my parents wanted me to get a real job instead (apparently going to university isn't the same thing!). So then I decided to be a fiction writer (queries are so much easier to write than grant requests). The author of #16 could be like my long lost twin. Okay, so I better vote for that one.

Wuthering Jane is an exciting 1847 word original novel featuring a protagonist named Catherine Eyre. Catherine, a cross between Mother Teresa and Brittney Spears, is a character the likes of which chick lit readers have never encountered. The Catherine that the world sees is devoted to working with the poor in her hometown of Rochester, but after long days at the soup kitchen she spends her evenings at Thornfield, a strip club located way, way out in the suburbs. At Thornfield, Catherine dons a blond wig and struts onto the stage lip-syncing and dancing. When she finally arrives home after a long day of serving her fellow man and skankiness, Catherine is so conflicted about her identity that she bathes in antibacterial gel.

This upbeat novel also features Catherine’s best friend, Heath, whose house sits upon a cliff. The bay window in Heath’s dining room provides the setting for their many heart to heart talks. This window overlooks the St. John Rivers, and only when gazing at the rushing waters can Catherine find the courage to acknowledge both parts of her personality. These hilarious conversations will sound familiar to readers as they have undoubtedly had similar conversations with their friends. As you well know, concerns about feeding the needy and contracting lice from pole-dancing are universal themes.

This breakthrough novel will also attract demographic groups that may previously have been reluctant to read chick lit. Wuthering Jane includes service to mankind (religious market) and services to men (finally encouraging males to read chick lit). After digesting the first three laugh-a-minute pages, please contact me and I will be glad to send the full manuscript. I have already begun work on my second original novel, Pride and Sensibility.

Sincerely,

Peggy

This was a great idea, Kate! Can't wait to see which one is the worst.